Sunday, November 27, 2016

Pride, priorities, and puppy games

My last post was pretty significant to me.  It represented a timestamped memento of this turning point I am on.  I have a sale coming up in two weeks (mmc.ceramics on Instagram and Marilyn McCauley-Potter/Maker of Things on Facebook for info), and among other things (due dates for grad class, preparation for the holidays) I am feeling a little overwhelmed.  I unpacked my inventory so I don't over-prepare, even though preparing for the sale is all I want to do (developing my brand and organizing are kind of therapeutic for me...).

In my crates of pottery, which remained untouched in the chaos of packing after the last sale, I found a little bit of pride.  Pride, but also my inner-critic.  She's usually a constructive critic, though.  In the silence of my second-floor studio, that looks a lot like an storage unit at the moment, my mind was loud with thought after thought.  I can't believe how many times I've packed and unpacked this cup.  I need to make more mugs with words.  I miss the dots, I wish I had time to revisit them.  Maybe I can create a hybrid surface design that doesn't take as long.  This plate does not belong with the rest.  How can I display these ornaments better?  I need to get more bags.  I need to clean this space.  I really need to write an 18-page paper...

I am chasing that dream, and it's playing games with me like a puppy that's escaped the yard.  If I go after it with too much intention, or too aggressively, it'll run.  It's having a great time, and it has no idea that I'm not playing.  I'm getting mad at it for being so hard to catch, but it's so damn cute, how can I be mad?  Maybe I should change my approach and casually pretend I'm not interested.  You know, a little hard-to-get.  Just when it thinks I'm heading home without it, I'll pounce and take it home.

Anyway, what I'm after is a relatively clean space for making, an inventory system that works, and most importantly, the fulfillment I get from creating.  It's that feeling that I miss the most.  That right-brain workout.  That time-passing state of mind that cleans up my headspace.  It's not selling the product of my efforts that I long's the engagement in the process, and all I have to do is move it from the bottom of my list to the top.

MMc Studio - circa Spring 2014

MMc Studio - today

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